Alvin’s Weblog

I seem to be a target for tags nowadays. I can’t help it but everytime I do a tag, I’ll make someone look like a fool. Remember the two girls tag? Man, look at the response from the girls, damn shiok I tell you! Previously, it was Wei wei and now it’s baby Alisa. Don’t worry, I’ll give her face and I’ll do the tag.

1) Tell 5 jokes

Nia bu, you think I am a joker mer? I tell you a joke enough la. The rest you go find joker Wei wei and Alisa to tell you la. Their joke so the very “funny” la.
OK, here goes:

One day, a man was walking in the jungle. As usual, he wanted to chop some wood for his family’s daily use. As he settled and started chopping, he heard a voice of an old woman asking for help. Curious, he set out finding where the voice came from. He finally found the old woman who was trapped under a heavy log.

Old woman: Young man, please help me get out of this. In return for your generosity, I’ll give you 3 matches that will grant you 3 wishes.

Man: Ohh, OK. I’ll help you anyway. Don’t worry about it.

(The man helped the woman out)

Old woman: Thank you young man. Here are your 3 matches. If you want anything, just take a match, raise it up in your hands and say yor wish out loud.

Man: Thanks a lot. i really isn’t necessary.

The old woman left and excited, the man ran back home and told his wife and children about the matches. Upon hearing the news, the man’s family became so excited they started asking for things.

Man’s wife: Lao kung, I want the best kitchen.

Eldest Son: Pa, I want a nice car.

Youngest Son: Pa, I want the best bicycle.

Daughter: Pa, I want Barbie doll.

The man, not knowing what to do came up with a brilliant idea.

Man: OK, keep quiet everyone. I’ll give you all the things you want.

The man then held up a match and loudly said:

Man: Simi lanjiao also want.

The lanjiao from everywhere came falling down from the sky covering his house.

Man: Shit, this is not what I meant. Damn it!

He then took another match

Man: Simi lanjiao also don’t want.

Then all the lanjiao disappeared, including his and his sons’.

Man: KNNCCB!!!

Ashamed and frustrated, he took out the third match and said

Man: Gimme back my lanjiao!!!

His lanjiao then came back but his sons lost theirs.

OK, those who have heard, shheessshhhh… Those who find it lame, please shehhheeeeehhh as well. Thank you.

No more jokes. I can’t think of any more early in the morning.

2) Name the top 4 person that you adore the most.

- My dad. He is my inspiration to be a better person in life. He is my role model.

- My mum. She took good care of me and has always been there for me for the past 23 years. She’d sacrifice herself to see me lead a better life, though I might be a little cranky on her at times. Thanks mum, love you lots!!!

- My dear. She gives me a whole new meaning of life. I never knew life could be this good until she came into my life. Thanks dear!

OK, I can think of no more. Top 3 can liao la. Mahai, why need 4? I so pantang number 4 you still gimme 4, you want this? *shows fist*

3) 3 animals you think resemble you:-

- Pig. A lot of people find me a pig OK. I am fat and I look like one.

- Lion. I like leading the pack and I like roaring at idiots who are too stupid to comprehend simple stuff.

- Rat. I am shy shy and I am an introvert. Besides, I am a rat in the chinese zodiac.
4) Tag 5 other bloggers after that:-

Tag simi lanjiao!!! You think other people so free to do this kinda thing like me mer? Who else want to tag me? Come la, put your horse la. I am not scared want la.